Thursday, October 30, 2008

Ben Smith gets an e-mail:

"What's crazy is this," he writes. "I was blown away by the outright racism, but these folks are f***ing undecided. They would call him a n----r and mention how they don't know what to do because of the economy."

In related news:

'Shiiit, we can't afford to be racist!'

'America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased.'
PJ O'Rourke

Moss Side

Moss Side Church of England. In days of old, seers entered a trance state and then informed anxious seekers what kind of mood the gods were in, and whether this was an auspicious time to begin a journey, get married, or start a war. The prophets of Israel repaired to the desert and then returned to announce whether Yahweh was feeling benevolent or wrathful. Today The Market's fickle will is clarified by daily reports from Wall Street and other sensory organs of finance. Thus we can learn on a day-to-day basis that The Market is "apprehensive," "relieved," "nervous," or even at times "jubilant." On the basis of this revelation awed adepts make critical decisions about whether to buy or sell. Like one of the devouring gods of old, The Market -- aptly embodied in a bull or a bear -- must be fed and kept happy under all circumstances. True, at times its appetite may seem excessive -- a $35 billion bailout here, a $50 billion one there -- but the alternative to assuaging its hunger is too terrible to contemplate.

1999 Atlantic piece by Harvey Cox on economic theology.

Looks like some stately home, but this building is divided into four flats.

Up Ocker Lips

Manchester is as good a place as any to have the offices of the mechanical harbringers of human doom? Industriousness, I guess. Hahhaa. Notice that the Terminators have leased the upstairs bit to Dr. Butt, circumcisionist. Ha!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Jack the Phantom Menace

Housemate comes home and says there's an employee in his building, befouling the toilets daily. He works for a law firm. 'He must have been watching too much ski Sunday', Nick says while adopting a downhill skier's pose, leaning forward while sitting on the couch.

Shipping company magnate Carl Barron says he has his suspects, but denies conducting a smear campaign amongst his less-liked employees.

Regarding Nick, Carl says 'I only wanted to take a deposition. But I know who likes the kebabs.'
'We'll get to the bottom of this.'

Nick then learned about the joys of the 'topshelf' and the 'reverse kanga'.


Max: 6 Min: -1

Friday, October 24, 2008


' Why are my S/N values out?'
'Because the phantom liquid is moving.'
'Should I repeat the measurement?'

The Runner

Bachmann the emu can't take a step backwards.

Klobuchar just about in tears.

'Weeee knowwww that times will change'

'Ahhh taaalk to Jeeesuuus, Jeeesuuus every day'

'Takin' numbers, takin' blame'

'She comes from nothing, hopin for a taste of fame'

'Awful sick and tired of the game'

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Old Trafford

Craig got us some tickets to Man U v. West Brom. In the pub before the game the only chant I could understand was 'Champions of England! Champions of Europe!'

Elliot noticed there were heaps of police over in the far corner of the stand. Maybe that was the spot for the West Bromwich fans.

Beer + beer + beer + champagne + beer + margaritas = Dave getting lost somewhere, waking up at home with a mild case of pneumonia, someone having to get off the bus to 'yodel in technicolour' (presence of mind there mate, nice one) and Craig falling asleep on the bus and waking up out in Didsbury.
I won't drink this much unless -
  • McCain wins
  • Obama wins


Chrissie here was a co-editor of 'Clarke's positioning in radiography'. Cleaned up all that filthy smut.